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June 7, 2017

But alas by the Grace of God, I have graduated

MY UPDATE:

Last year I gave a lesson to the young girls called “Your Season of Independence”. During that lesson I talked about how everything in life has season, and that at that time it was their season to focus on God and themselves. As in, focus on your relationship with God, your ministry, your studies, and accomplishing your goals. I said one very true thing, and it was that when you do things out of season, things become harder than they were intended to be.  It’s not to say that you won’t be able to accomplish what you want, it’s just that the struggle is greater. I am a real living example of the struggle of doing things out of season.  Real life struggles, like worrying who will take care of your children, which can be quite stressful. . . But alas by the Grace of God, I have graduated! 


It was not an easy journey. I had many struggles and obstacles to overcome, and quite honestly, I think back now and wonder how I never lost my sanity. The first thing was who was going to watch my then 3 year old Benji.  I had a few moments of panic, but I am thankful for my church family who is always willing to help.  A sweet sister from my church watched him until I was able to get him into daycare. My husband would drive him to her house at like 6am, and I would take the bus to school.  We only had one car, at the time.  Then I finally got him into the daycare at my school, but now the problem was that we only had one car.  So Benji and I had to take the bus to school, and this fine… until winter rolled along. I had two 8 am classes, and I had to leave the house at 6 am to catch the bus with my then 3 year old in -30 weather.  That was brutal.  Luckily mid-winter God provided us with another vehicle, and that made things easier for us. 

First year classes were a breeze, it was mostly computer based and I found it rather enjoyable to be honest.  The thing that happened was… I got pregnant. The dilemma was that now I didn’t know what to do because I really wanted to finish school, but I also knew that with a baby I wouldn’t be able to.  So I reached out to my teacher, who was so wonderful and supportive, and she said the best thing was for me to take a year off and return after.  So after praying and discussing with hubby, that’s what I did. It was great to stay home with the kids, but I also saw the stress the finances caused on my husband. I even attempted to find a job, but never got called.  I do believe that was the will of God though, because had I worked, I probably wouldn’t have returned to school.  Seeing all my first year classmates graduating and posting about their jobs, saddened me but was also that push I needed to return to school and finish.   

The first thing about returning to school was finding who was going to take care of 9 month old baby. Luckily, a sister from church started a daycare and Jason was her first baby, and she even picked Benjamin up from school. So that was great!  Then mid semester she told me the horrible news of her returning back to work, and once again there was stress. God knows all things and prepares a way before you even know it though. God allowed my In-laws moved close to us, so FIL was able to pick Benji up from school. AND just in the nick-of-time, another sister from church became available to babysit Jason (and she still does).  I know it seems rather stranger but I promise I do not leave my baby with strangers, these are women who I love and are dear to my heart. They have been with us since the beginning of ministry and have been like mothers to me, and I am so grateful to God for them. 

3rd Semester was hard! Apart from having a young baby, a 5 year old, wife duties and ministry responsibilities, the school work load was HEAVY!!!   If there was a time where I showed time management skills, it was then. I adapted a mindset that was to do everything as soon as it was assigned. During those long breaks between classes I would not take time off, I would work through it and did everything possible to finish all my work in school. Even then, I found myself writing essays at 3am. It was quite overwhelming, but I managed to survive (zombie mode).  It was worth it though, because by the end of the semester I was able to explain the process of a civil suit, or a divorce case. I finally felt that all my efforts were worth something. 

For last semester I didn’t have any child care issues, Thank God! What happened in the month of January to mid Feb was that everyone in my home was getting sick. Like back to back, I don’t even know what, or why, or how.  All I know is that, I swear, I didn’t sleep the whole month. Even my friends in school were starting to say things like “again? Your kids are sick AGAIN?”  I had Monday’s off, and I was going to the Doctor’s office every Monday.  The receptionist there will know us forever. FINALLY everything started to go back to normal!  I missed two assignments because of these unfortunate events, but I still passed all my classes. I found a Co-op with a Spanish speaking lawyer, she hired me on right after co-op and it has been a huge blessing on my life. Lastly, yesterday was my graduation and I graduated with Distinction.  If you don’t know what that means… In my school, it is one category above honours!

So, is it possible to accomplish your dreams a little late, and out of season? Yes it is.  
Would it had been easier if I would have done it when it was intended? 100%.  You can avoid all these struggle if you just do things in their season. Keep that in mind! 


Last thing I want to say is… The biggest support I had was from my husband, since the beginning.  I applaud him for everything he has done in this journey.  Secondly my family, and my church fam has all had a part in this journey, from words of encouragement to prayers. Oh and Ms. Salazar for letting me do my interview assignment on her. The diploma is in my name, but in a sense I feel like we all graduated. 


*Shout out to Ms. Jocelyn Castro for being a reader for 5 years! YOU ROCK!  

June 3, 2017

“He’s a natural leader” she said...

Hey there,

Long time no talk. Life has sure changed since the last time I posted something. The last time I posted was about Jason's first birthday.  I posted that way back in February, soooooo I am thinking we need to have a little update post(s).

Let's start with Benjamin,

My boy is five now. He is almost done his first year of school EVER! Can you believe?  Just yesterday I was dropping him off for his first day of school, and walking away with such a heavy heart. Let me tell ya, it never goes away.  You get used to dropping them off, but when I see him walk into the school my heart is once again heavy.  I assume it will always be this way, and I will just have to endure it. Just like every other parent has had to.   All you can do is pray!

I have attended my first parent-teacher conference. You know how they say the way to make a person feel good, is to compliment their child?  Well I have never left a place feeling so proud. The teacher raved about how MY SON, was such a compassionate person, and how he was aware of other people’s feelings. She told me about the time where Benjamin had a “grand idea”, and it was to build a pretend living room station, where all the kids could go “watch TV” and eat their snacks, AND how he formulated a plan and got all the children involved to accomplish his vision. You  “He’s a natural leader” she said, as I fanned my peacock tail. It was only for a mere moment though, because I quickly was remind that child in not my own, but belongs to God. So as I returned to my vehicle my eyes filled with tears as I thanked God for my amazing child.


Benji is a great big brother.  This title includes; looking out for his little brother, holding hands with him to ensure there are no runaways, watching your iPad together, sharing your snack and fighting over anything.  Yes they fight, they cry and mom has to be the mediator.  Just the other day I made them hug it out and they both cried. It was quite comical, but I maintained my I-mean-business face. I mean, they shouldn’t fight, but that’s what a healthy sibling relationship requires. If you have never fought with your siblings… well you might have unresolved issues. Lol. OH in case you are wondering, YES the one year old is quite the defender.

How much my boy has grown! Facebook reminds me of that almost every day.  I always go on there just to see what memories will pop up and almost every day, it is baby Benji 5 YEARS AGO! Incredible. Tear. BUT what really did it, was when my brother in law sent me a video he found of Baby Benjamin who didn’t even know how to talk yet. I cried.  Apparently the more your kids grow, the more you cry.  Truth. I cry all the time, and there are no holding back these floodgates. ha!
I will never forget when Benji approached me and said “Mom, we are family and we are in love!”, and what an accurate description that was!
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