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October 24, 2014

Tips for Mom-Wife-Student.

When I wrote this post It had been a couple of days after I had received my acceptance letter to college.  I was very excited, as anyone who graduated 10 years ago would be. Finally, one day I laid on my bed trying to fall asleep, and I began to think that I would have to add student to the list of my responsibilities. So, as you can imagine, I did not get much sleep that night just thinking about what I was going to do.  In prayer I asked God to show me how I can balance all of these responsibilities without "burning myself out".  I feel as of now, God has really helped me find a balance. So, now I have couple of tips for those you who are on the same boat, or will be on the same boat as I am. 
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1. PRAYER KEEPS YOU SANE  
If you are a "worry wart" then I have two suggestions for you. Keep an active prayer life. You know how psychologist recommend you keep a diary and write everything down?  Well I suggest the same but in my suggestion, I suggest that you talk with God.What will you say to God? EVERYTHING. Tell him what you are worried about, what is stressing you, what your concerns are.. everything. God will give you peace of mind and you will be able to think clearly.. like Philippians 4:6-7 says " Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  .. Which lead's me to the second point. . .


Write the above verse down, and put it somewhere you can see it everyday. Remember that the word says do not be anxious about anything, don't stress, don't get overwhelmed.  Just pray, and God will give you peace that transcends all understanding. Everyone will wonder how is this person so relaxed, and we are all stressed out?.. well you know the answer. It's all God. 


2. 100% A 100% OF THE TIME? 
Sorry it doesn't matter how much of super mom you are, there is no possible way that you can give 100% to all of your responsibilities, all the time. Come to terms that there will be times where you will have to focus on one responsibility more and ignore the rest.   You have to divide your time, and make sure you have time for yourself too. .. which leads me to my next advice. 

3. KNOW YOUR PRIORITIES
Know your priorities, and make a schedule.  For me, when I am at home, my family and home are the priority. So I schedule homework time during school hours. When I have a class at 11 am, I go to school at 9 am and try to get any assignments done, that way my afternoons are free.  Sitting in the cafeteria eating and chit-chatting with all your friends during your hour long lunch break, is a waist of time and money. After all, you are paying for school, so why not take advantage of that time and head to the lab to work on school work. Have your lunch there.  Make school work a priority when you are at school, it's honestly the best time for homework to be done anyway. My family, and church are a major priority for me. So, doing all my school work at school, leaves the afternoons and weekends free of homework and allows me to focus on my family and church.

4. DO NOT PROCRASTINATE 
Can't stress this enough! Do your homework/assignments as soon as you get them.  why? If you have a child you know they are full of surprises. They get sick randomly, or do things that require immediate attention. Doing your homework right away will eliminate the stress of rushing to get things done on time, at least when it comes to school. You know what else doing your work right away allows...getting ALL your homework done.  When you get all your homework done, you won't have to stay up til wee hours in the morning studying for a test. You will already know the material. Pretty much all your tests are based on the homework you get.. so do it, do it right away, and you will be OK.

5. ORGANIZATION IS KEY
I can't stress how much being organized will simplify your life. A To-do list will be your best friends. I have a school planner where I have all my due dates, tests and homework list.  Then, I have everything else on my iPad.  Write everything down...even if it's a song you have to print out for church. This is so important because it will keep you sane. Trust me.

6. LEARN TO SAY NO
I understand that as Christians we want to support each-other, but we also need to understand that we won't be able to accept every invitation we receive. Which leads me back to priorities.  Should I go to that birthday party or should I get some rest because I have an early class.  What is your priority?  For me, it's school. Therefore I would have to decline the invitation to the birthday party.  In a nice way, of course. Taking on "too much" can overwhelm you, so make sure you don't volunteer for any extra stuff that are'nt necessary.

7. HAVE A PURPOSE
What's my reason for school? I want to get educated for several reasons.  I feel that the skills I am learning will benefit the church. I want to teach my son the importance of continuing your education, and my husband and I want to be homeowners one day.  I think about these things everyday when I head to school.  They keep me motivated!

In the end balancing all of life's responsibilities comes down to prioritizing, scheduling and being organized. The most important thing to remember is that we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength. 
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Sorry for the tired look, but I was actually a bit sick here :D

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10/18/18 UPDATE: 
When I wrote this, I had finished my first year with one child, Benjamin. After the first year, I had to take a year off to give birth to Jason. When I returned for my 2nd year of school, I had Jason as a baby and Benji as a toddler. That was tough! However, I still followed all my own advice that is in this post. Even so, I still had to pull some "half-nighters" (until 3 or 4am), and I did cry a few times. My husband was my biggest help and supporter. I definitely could not have done it without him. With that in mind, If I had to give extra advice on this post it would be the following:

8. Establish a good support group. 
 Whether it's a neighbor, family, church group or class mates, a good support group will help you get through school. Sometimes, you need just a few hours to study or finish an essay, and having someone you can to for help is key! AND don't be afraid to ask for help!

9. Make a buddy in all your classes. 
Have that person that will take notes for you if you are not there. Things will come up where you will have to miss class or be late to class, and you want to be covered. I tried my best to make at least a couple of friends or contacts that could inform me of anything I missed. Also, return the favor when they are absent. In addition to that, make sure you have all the contact info to your professors, and do not be afraid to ask for help.

10. Don't forget to show love. 
It does not matter how stressed and overwhelmed you are, don't forget to hug your kids, and kiss your hubby.  Take a few min everyday to acknowledge your loved ones, and the people helping you through it. Also, show yourself some love too. Don't feel sorry for yourself. I did this alot, and it's not healthy.  Just remain positive.  It's not forever, and remind yourself that the outcome will be awesome!!


3 comments:

Me said...

Thanks for this post. I will be in the same boat soon!

Ruth Alvarez said...

This is actually so good!

woo! I'm gunna share it on twitter!

Ray said...

Love the pictures!

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